Negadelphia Has Arrived at the Perfect Time: Almost Everything Is Terrible

On Sunday, Sept. 20, the Eagles beat the Titans 24-20 in Nashville. Jalen Hurts hit Darius Cooper with nine seconds left, everybody exhaled, and the Eagles were 2-0. They have not won a game since. That was more than six weeks ago.

Here's what else was happening that same Sunday: the Phillies beat the Mets 7-2, moved to 86-70, and, per the Inquirer's game story, cut their magic number to clinch a playoff spot to three. (Yes, the post Destiny Lugardo put out on the morning of Oct. 29 is right. We checked, because we're the kind of people who check.) Since then, the Phillies nearly coughed up that playoff spot, clinched on the 162nd game, played a three-game series in Atlanta, and went home. The entire Phillies postseason fits inside the Eagles' winless stretch. So does the Sixers' season so far. So does a chunk of the Flyers' misery.

That's why Negadelphia is here now. Not because of one bad week. Because of a bad stretch in four sports at the same time, and nobody's been keeping score.

The Eagles: 2-6, six straight, no notes

Hurts is on injured reserve. Cam Jurgens was traded to Baltimore. Lane Johnson retired a few weeks after starting Week 1. Saquon Barkley and DeVonta Smith sat out practice on Oct. 29, and the only healthy running backs on the field were Jaydon Blue and Elijah Mitchell, who's on the practice squad (NBC10). Tanner McKee started at quarterback in Washington on Nov. 1, and Smith was inactive (NFL gamebook).

The two wins were 24-22 over Washington and 24-20 at Tennessee, six points combined, the second one on a touchdown with nine seconds left. Since then: a 20-point loss in Chicago, one-score losses to the Rams and Jaguars, an 11-pointer to Carolina, then 38-21 against Dallas after taking a 21-20 lead early in the second half. Then 27-10 in Washington on Nov. 1, where they led 10-3 after one quarter and didn't score again. They're minus-65 in point differential, and through seven games The Almanac had the offense dead last in yards per play, at 4.5. Against Washington it was 3.9 (NFL gamebook). (Third-party numbers. They also match what your eyes have been telling you.)

Then Nick Foles, Super Bowl LII MVP, went on his podcast and said: "There is dysfunction in Philly." Nick Sirianni's reply on 94WIP: "Nick Foles isn't in the building with us." He also said the team shouldn't get wrapped up in "that crap," and that it has "a lot to fix." Which is the first thing anybody's said all month that everybody agrees on.

Panic Index: 9/10. Not a 10 only because Washington is 2-4-1 and the NFC East is somehow still a thing. Yes, one of those two Washington wins was us.

The Phillies: 88-74 is a liar

This team was 9-19 when it fired Rob Thomson on April 28. Don Mattingly took over and went 79-55. Then, with a 6½-game wild-card lead on Sept. 1, they lost four straight, scored three runs doing it, went 21 innings without scoring, and watched J.T. Realmuto go 0-for-34. They clinched on the last day, then lost to the Braves in a three-game series. That's five straight playoff trips with a quicker exit each time (per the AP). Baseball-Reference's Pythagorean record, built from runs scored and allowed, has them at 83-79, so even the 88 wins were about five games of good luck.

Zack Wheeler was voted NL Comeback Player in the Players Choice Awards after going 14-5 with a 3.00 ERA coming back from thoracic outlet syndrome. He also gave up two runs in four innings of relief in the elimination game. We love him. We are also paying attention.

Panic Index: 6/10. The offseason has barely started and they already need a catcher plan.

The Flyers: 4-9-4, and the captain agrees

The Flyers lost 5-2 to Washington on Oct. 28. Through 15 games: three wins, a minus-21 goal differential, and 1.93 goals a game (NBC Sports Philadelphia). Then they beat Utah 6-3 on Nov. 1 and lost 4-2 to Minnesota on Nov. 3. That's 12 points in 17 games. Last season they had 21 through 17 (NBC Sports Philadelphia). They also opened this season with a nine-game winless streak, which the Flyers' team records on NHL.com list as the longest winless start in franchise history. So "historic" is real, at least for that.

Then Sean Couturier, the captain, said: "At times this year, we're soft, I would say." Rick Tocchet's answer: Couturier isn't wrong. Nick Seeler said it's "not about 'me, me, me,'" and Tocchet said he'll have to start taking ice time over that kind of thing. We're not going to guess who Seeler meant.

Here's the Yeah, But: the numbers say they hit about as much as everyone else. As of Oct. 29, Philly was fourth in the NHL in total hits, though only the Flyers and the Maple Leafs had played 15 games, and 13th in hits per 60 minutes, per the Inquirer. So when the captain calls his team soft and the data says they're middle of the pack, the problem isn't hitting. It's that they're not scoring, they're not defending, and they can't win a battle that matters. Nobody hits their way out of a 2.18-goals-a-game offense.

Panic Index: 8/10. Something is very wrong, and the captain said it first.

The Sixers: 8-1, and we're still nervous

Nobody's calling the Sixers bad. They're 8-1, alone in first in the East, and they've got Maxey, Embiid, Jaylen Brown and LeBron James. Great.

Two of their first four wins needed a rescue. Against Cleveland on Oct. 22, they trailed 69-45 at halftime, turned it over 15 times in the first half (per ESPN), and wiped out a 29-point deficit to win 114-106, the biggest Sixers comeback of the play-by-play era. Then in Indiana on Oct. 28, they took a 62-52 lead into halftime, lost the third quarter 36-13, trailed by 13 entering the fourth, and won 114-109 on a 39-21 final period. The Pacers were missing Tyrese Haliburton and others. They trailed at halftime in three of their first five games. Last season they were dead last in third-quarter net rating (NBC Sports Philadelphia). They've won five straight since, including 112-106 in Detroit on Nov. 4, where they led by as many as 18 (NBA.com official scorer's report) and still needed Jaylen Brown to block a Cade Cunningham three with 38 seconds left (NBC Sports Philadelphia). The record says 8-1. The shape of the early wins says this team can dig holes it needs a star turn to climb out of. The one loss, 106-93 to Detroit on Oct. 25, was the night nobody came to the rescue.

Panic Index: 5/10. We're listening.

So what is this?

Negadelphia is where we find what's wrong, follow the meltdowns, track the panic, and run a Yeah, But when the facts argue back. We don't invent problems. Philly keeps handing them to us.

There's always next year. Every year.